Biggest Blessing

7 years ago today I found out I was going to be a Mom for the first time. I was so excited and terrified at the same time. I had just finished my last class at BYU earlier that day. I felt "funny" and was wondering why I started to cry while I walked away from taking my last final. That night it was confirmed why I was so emotional. Blake and Ashley have been gone since last Friday and I miss them terribly. It is fun to go out, spend time with friends, and get stuff done while they are gone, but nothing compares to being with my kids. They are the best part of my life. When they are home I crave a clean house, but when they are gone and the house is spotless, I crave kid messes. Even though it has been hard being a single parent, the blessings out weigh all the frustrations. My kids have taught me so much. I love their unconditional love and their unwavering faith. Heavenly Father knew I needed them. They are my biggest blessing.

Blake Makes His Debut and Going a Hundred Miles An Hour..

A few weeks ago, Blake played with my Dad's band for the first time. He was so happy. He played again tonight with them. He now says he is an "official" member and asked my Dad how long this band will last. :)

Lisa is the best violin/fiddle player ever and has a great voice.

My sister Micki has the prettiest alto voice and she can harmonize with anyone. I am just a band groupie.

My Dad getting down with the music. He has played in bands since he was 16. I was Blake's age when my sisters and I sang with my Dad's band at the Calgary Stampede in Canada.

Blake did so well. My little lefty.

Random pictures. This is the cute invitation that Ashley and I got for a Valentine's Party. The party was so cute.

My sweet former Activity day girls heart attacked my back door and gave me the BEST sugar cookies.

Blake found this old picture on a piece of paper. When I saw it, it made me get teary eyed. I wish my kids were still little like this. Ashley had the mushiest baby cheeks that I loved to kiss and make her laugh. Time goes by so stinkin fast.

Ashley sacked out on the floor. She rarely does this, but always falls asleep in the car and now tells me if we are going anywhere longer than a 5 minute ride, "wake me up when we get there."

I got a job a week ago. It was a tender mercy right when I needed it. I have the best Mom in the world who watches my kids for me. She is the best! I have really enjoyed working with the great kids that I aide. I feel like I am going a 100 miles an hour though. There aren't enough hours in a day to do everything.

I told Blake I had a job interview so he set up a play office in the playroom and called me in for a "Blake Interview." The first question he asked me was, "What is the worst thing you have ever done in your life?" :)

There's A Big Beautiful World Out There!

By: Nancy Carlson

There's a lot to be scared of, that's for sure!
There's that mean looking dog, and booming thunderstorms.
There are rollar coasters, and scary stories in the news.
There's a lot to be scared of, like getting up in front of a whole bunch of people, and spiders and other creepy crawly things.
There are clowns, and spooky shadows in your room, and people who look different from you.
All this scary stuff can make you want to hide under your covers and never come out.

But after a while, hiding under your covers can get pretty boring.

Maybe that scary dog only looks mean.
If you hide under your covers, you won't see the rainbow after the storm, and you might never enjoy the thrill of the roller coaster ride.
If you hide under your covers, you'll miss your mother saying everything is going to be all right, and you might never know how great you sound singing a solo.
If you hide under your covers, you might not see all the interesting things in your own backyard.
You'll miss laughing out loud, and you won't see the stars come out.
And just think of all the new friends you'll never meet.

There's a lot to be scared of, but there's even more to look forward too... so throw off those covers! There's a big, beautiful world out there waiting just for you!

This Book was written on September 12th, 2001.

I thought this book that we got from the library was so cute. I wanted to put this in for Blake and Ashley's blog book.

Mommy is so proud of you both for always standing up for what is right and not being afraid. Mommy loves you Blake and Ashley!

Happy, Happy Birthday My Baby Girl!

I can't believe my baby will be 4 tomorrow. This is a picture I took of Ashley and I when she was a week old. I am doing this post today because she will be with her Dad tomorrow for her actual birthday and my feelings are way to tender to do it tomorrow. I am so happy that she is four, but it is also very emotional that my BABY is 4.

I still remember how my eyes stung when Dr. Reese turned on those huge lights when it was time to deliver. I had been up ALL night in labor for 19 hours. I remember saying, "Ka-chow," I was so tired. :) When Ashley was about to come out she gave me the hardest kick ever. Then and there I knew she was going to be feisty, and she sure is.

It was so nice to be able to hold her right after delivery and she didn't have to go to the NICU like Blake, and she nursed right away. The doctor said that he had never delivered a baby with a grumbling tummy, she was starving. My water had broke right when I was getting up to go have lunch, that was 12:20pm, she was born at 7:46am, we were both starving.

Ashley is so much fun. She can be very girly and then all the sudden play super hero and swords with Blake. She is also the first one to start throwing her fists at Blake. She can definitely hold her own. Ashley loves to sing and dance. Two weeks ago we were at Macey's getting groceries and Ashley was belting out, "It's a quarter after one, I'm all alone, and I need you now." I got several comments and smiles. The young BYU kids thought it was great she knew that song.

Just last night Ashley was having a hard time falling asleep so she wanted me to crawl in bed with her. Her bed is her crib turned into a toddler bed. I was so happy it didn't break, so I could draw circles around her eyes. I have never laid so still in my whole life. I was waiting to hear some cracks or something. :)

We love our Ashes! Blake and I would be so sad of we didn't have her. We love you baby girl!

Funnies

I was just going through some papers and found a list of funny things Ashley and Blake have said in the last few months.

• While Ashley was doing Jillian Michaels with me, she looked up at me trying to pick up a weight. "Oh Mom, looks like my weight is stuck to the floor."
• Blake after watching Sound of Music, "they should call that The Neverending Sound of Music."
• Ashley had been asking me to come help her in the bathroom a lot. I said, "Ashley you are almost 4 years old, you need to be doing this all by yourself. She replies, " I go potty all the time by myself when I am in the bathtub." Gross!
• Blake, "Man ,that Justin Bieber sure sounds like a girl."
• Blake, "Mom, your teeth are as white as white paper with no scribbles on it." Thanks Blake. :)
• At 4am one morning this week I could here little feet coming into my room. I heard the click of the remote for the TV in my room, next thing I knew Ashley crawled into bed with me and asks, "Hey Mom, do you need a steam mop?" Dang Infomercials.

December to Remember

Ashley and her crazy hair! My mom put a cup in her hair to make it stand up. Hiliarious!!

Blake turned 6 on Dec.17th, the night before his birthday we went to Pirate Island to celebrate.

The bday boy!

This picture makes me laugh. Classic Ash.

Okay, this is what happens when I tried to take a pic of all three of us. I had no idea it was zoomed in all the way. :) Our first ever attempt at karaoke at Pirate Island.

Blake "opening up" his bday present. Does a target bag count?

Playing with his new criss cross crash.

The cars go so fast on this thing, it is pretty awesome!

Blake and Ashley were with Eric Christmas Eve and morning, they came back at 1pm and we opened presents. They are so sweet they wanted me to open the present they got me first.

Opening presents

pillow pets

Ashley really wanted a walking kitty. She was sure excited!

Merry Christmas to me! I got a new car. My cousin Jim totally hooked me up with a 2009 Honda CR-V that only has 6,000 miles on it. I absolutely love it!! It is the best! It drives so well, and has so many fun features. I am so grateful.

Ode to my Camry...

Definitely not the best morning to take a picture!


Tomorrow my awesome parents are flying down to Phoenix to get my new car. I am so excited, and so grateful that they are doing this for me. Before I get my new car I thought I would pay tribute to my Camry. Here are some of my memories of this awesome car:

• I got my drivers license in this car
• I drove to all three of my graduations in this car (high school, Ricks and BYU)
• I drove up to Ricks my freshman year in this car with my parents. One of the tires blew on the freeway, I was sure we were going to die :)
• I drove to get married in this car, and we paid my parents a dollar for the car so my parents could say they "sold" it to us. So nice of them.
• We got new tires on the car and not a week later two got slashed. I cried.
• Drove to the hospital in the middle of night in labor
• Brought Blake home from the hospital after 6 days in the NICU
• Drove to all my doctors appointments for my kids
• When I was 8 months pregnant with Blake I managed to lock BOTH sets of keys in the car. in the middle of no where, near Moab. That was interesting.
• Drove to law school in this car
• Drove back from law school completely heart broken. My Dad and I had drove down to Vegas to pack up the kids and my stuff. I was the only one in the car following my Dad in the Uhaul. I bawled the whole way back. I remember just barely being able to see the red lights of the Uhaul. My radio in the car doesn't work, but while I was trying to get it to work the only song I heard was Taylor Swift's "White Horse." So grateful, the Lord has healed my heart. I never want to feel that kind of heartache again.
• Drove to get divorced in the car
• Drove Blake to his first days of preschool and kindergarten

My kids and I have had great memories in this car. This car has been so good to me. It has 231,000 miles on it. It drinks oil like a champ, going through one of those 5 quart jugs in a month. I am grateful it has held up for this long and has not given me any major problems. I hope my CR-V will hold up for 17 years like this Camry did. :)